Achievements

The game's achievements can be obtained during conversation checks at the end of a quest or a scene.

Achievement Name	Achievement Description	How to Achieve
An Early Goodnight	"Does anyone need a mop? Maybe it's too early to tell..."	Try to enter the school after helping Maxine dig up the Locked Box at night during Hooking Up.
Breaking All the Rules	"Stop in the name of love! Even if it's filthy and taboo."	Go after Flora during The Statement after completing Tiny Thirsty Tree.
Burned Notice	"No guard rails, wholesales, or paper trails. You're the spy that didn't get burned."	Burn the Letter from Maxine with the lighter in your Kitchen.
Call Me, Beep Me!	"In danger and trouble, I'm there on the double. Inside the air duct, that is."	Hide in the air vent in both The Glowing Spider Eggs and Twisted Fate.
Cat Whisperer	"A sense of smell and a silver tongue? Felines moisten in your presence."	Talk your way out of getting caught sniffing Isabelle's panties during Gathering Storm.
Chiseled Jawline	"Marbleous! Monumental GigaChad moment."	Disguise yourself as a statue during Spell You Later.
Delivish	"Even with the alarm blaring in your ears, you went straight for the porn magazine. That's dedication."	Read the Porn Magazine while your Alarm Clock is going off.
End of Time	"They say that time eventually runs out for everyone, but you've certainly made a point of crippling it."	Smash your Alarm Clock twice.
Eye of the Storm	"In the typhoon that is the chaos of life, you're the eye of the storm. Calm and centered."	Spare your Alarm Clock twice.
Flying High Again	"If you could be inside my head, you'd see that black and white is red."	Have the birds eat your crops during Potted Weeds.
Glorious Bastard	"Cum demons. Wall-dolls. Nothing will stop you in your quest for fellatio."	Stick your dick in the Secret Locker's opened back panel.
Goose Goes, Hank!	"Your name is actually Hank. You didn't restart the game just to unlock this achievement. You're that one golden goose. No hanky-panky."	Name your character Hank and ask Jacklyn for paper when she's not in the Art Classroom during Stolen Hearts.
Hand of Fate	"Violence is oftentimes the big changer of fates."	Spank Kate as many times as possible during Dethroning the Queen.
Here, Kitty Kitty!	"And they said you weren't a pussy-whisperer. Fools!"	During The Glowing Spider Eggs, have Maxine tell you that Spinach is sleeping while she's clearly awake after you ask to be a reporter for the school newspaper.
Inspired	"Inspiration is a fickle mistress. But you're just happy to be in the same sentence as the word "mistress.""	Paint your masterpiece with a Beaver Carcass during Art Through Suffering.
Kate's Spy	"You're not proud of what you've done. No one is."	Learn Isabelle's focus classes and favorite drink after siding with Kate during Tour de School.
Lord of the Stones	"So smooth, the rest of the world is crooked and uneven."	Collect 5 stones in your Kitchen after joining Maxine's Association of Smooth Stones.
Master of Disguise	"Fool you once, fool you twice, fool you thrice. Always the fool."	Trick the Guard with a disguise.
Offer Refused	"Can't barter without cash. You've refused the offer of the Codfather."	Try to buy a Fish from the Codfather with no money.
Philanthropist	"Who knew you were such a do-gooder? Now, what's the ulterior motive?"	Have Kate donate to charity as a forfeit and free the Nurse during Twisted Desire, while not having Nurse's Compromising Photo.
Pussy Scent	"The best scent known to man... and all animals, I guess."	Have Spinach sniff the Nurse's Panties during Search & Rescue.
Putting Things Together	"It's like peanut butter and jelly, cookies and milk, yo' mama and all of the above. Some things just work well together."	Successfully combine 2 items for the first time.
Riddle Me This	"You never considered it before, but now you know. Tseb eht si enixam."	Solve all of Maxine's riddles in Paint It Red without Isabelle's help.
Silver Tongue	"Talking your way out of trouble isn't all your tongue can do. Also, cunnilingus."	Tell the Guard you're leaving swim practice during The Glowing Spider Eggs.
Sock Dispenser	"Socks for all. No more barefoot servants."	Refuse a blowjob from the Nurse after betting on her freedom during Twisted Desire.
Standing Up	"Your spine is developing nicely. Soon, you'll be able to stand upright like other Homosapien."	Call Kate out on her ugly personality during Tour de School.
Taken Down a Peg	"Humiliating, but also hot. Taking it deep for Jacklyn."	Get pegged by Jacklyn during The Statement.
Teddy Bear	"People call you Teddy because you're so huggable. Or maybe it's because you're somewhat skimpy and perverted."	Receive two hugs from Lindsey during Nothing Wrong With Me by catching her when she falls and helping her get a change of clothes.
The Actual Goat	"Definitely not a sheep. You can touch it as much as you like. It won't explode."	Buy a goat on the Dark Web during The Dive.
The All-Seeing One	"Nothing slips past you. Not even Maxine's nefarious plans."	Eavesdrop on Lindsey and Maxine's conversation in Photogenic.
The Dark Side	"Some philosophers may call it morally questionable... but Kate is way hotter than those nerds."	Side with Kate during Tour de School.
The Mark of Shame	"So either you cheated or you have way too much time on your hands. Both are disgraceful. Wear your mark of shame proudly!"	Fetch all the items Flora requests for in Chili Con Carnal Sin without making a mistake.
The Only Nymph	"Alone in the forest, the nymph threw shy glances over his shoulder."	During Hooking Up, try to flee the Forest Glade 5 times instead of digging for Maxine.
The Queen Bee Decree	"Down at the Ninth Circle, right next to Mr. Iscariot."	Side with Kate repeatedly during the opening of The Dog Trick and tell Isabelle that she'll need to bow before the queen.
The Queen Bee Stinger	"The poison enters the bloodstream, corrupting the senses one by one."	Tell Kate that Isabelle will be leashed and potty trained in no time during the opening of The Dog Trick.
The Right Kind of Bust	"Art is life, and you're living proof."	Successfully disguise yourself as a statue during The Glowing Spider Eggs.
The Truce of a Lifetime	"Some battles should only exist in the mind."	Fight the Dangerous Crab after giving it Strawberry Juice, an Apple, and a Fish.
Top Hat	"Is that a hat or a hot air balloon? Either way, it's a perfect fit for your head."	During The Glowing Spider Eggs, explain to Lindsey that covering yourself in Silver Paint is part of an art project.
We Leave in Peace	"I'm not saying it was aliens, but..."	Read the message on the crop circle outside of the school.